The Headmaster's Fury
by SylvaDragon
Summary: It is very unusual that Albus Dumbledore gets really angry. What could have happened to make him so furious today ? ADMM in chapter two. Finally updated, and completed.
1. Chapter 1

The Headmaster's Fury

Chapter One

It had been a quiet Sunday afternoon, until high in the tallest tower a door slammed loudly, echoing down through the passages and chambers of the castle, breaking the almost soporific Sunday peace into discordant fragments. A few seconds later and a trail of fury swept through the castle, as Albus Dumbledore stormed along the corridors, face flushed with rage, icy blue eyes flashing like lightning streaking across a stormy sky. His vivid red dressing gown billowed angrily around him, and tendrils of sodden silver hair clung damply to his shoulders, as drops of water dared to cascade from his brow, and wend their way down his face.

All those who saw him coming took one look at the Headmaster's face and made themselves scarce, never in living memory had anyone seen Albus Dumbledore look so angry. Even the bravest cringed against walls, shrunk into dark corners, and tried to pretend that they didn't exist, as the Headmaster strode furiously past them.

Warning whispers spread through the school, as a tense silence fell across the castle like the calm before a storm. Even the ghosts hid. Only Severus, deep in his dungeons, immersed in his latest potions experiment, remained unaware of the Headmaster's furious progress through the school. Unaware of his peril Severus emerged from his dungeons, and barely noticing the uncanny silence that hung in the passages, made his way to the potions classroom for supplies.

He exited his classroom at the exact same time that Albus turned into the passage outside it. Severus who was locking the door carefully, and so had his back to Albus, still failed to realise that anything was wrong.

"SNAPE !" An unusually cold but familliar voice snapped.

Cursing, Severus turned to protest at the unwarranted rudeness, which had caused him to drop several very expensive ingredients all over the floor. As soon as he saw the look on Albus' face, the words froze on Severus' lips, as he turned even paler than normal. Cold blue eyes swept the Potions Master from head to toe. Under the intense force of those icy eyes and tight lips, Severus felt himself shrink slightly.

His perusal complete, Albus spoke, his tone unusually hard, and utterly devoid of it's normal warmth and gentleness. "The entire school is to be summoned to the Great Hall immediately !"

For once, just for once, Severus didn't argue or question, he simply obeyed. Within minutes the Great Hall was full of staff and students, all whispering among themselves - each one asking the same questions. Why had Dumbledore summoned them, and why was their normally genial Headmaster so angry ?

With a resounding crash the large oak doors were flung open, and Albus strode to his place behind the large table at the head of the hall. Instantly silence fell, a tense breathless silence that only comes when a large crowd scarcely dares to move, as hushed expectant faces gazed up at the Headmaster.

"This is a very serious matter indeed !" Albus said sternly, then paused, and swept the assembled staff and students with a gaze which made even the bravest tremble. "Someone has stolen my favourite rubber duck !" Albus thundered so loudly, that the chandeliers shook, and several first years fell off their seats.

_Author's Notes_

_*Grins evily* I wanted to give the impression that Albus was angry over something far more serious than a rubber duck, and then have this big twist at the end, which I hoped would be amusing. I hope I was succesful with this ? And please don't throw things at me. ;) It was really fun to write him so angry._

_Minerva makes her appearance in chapter two. A chapter where Albus really tests her limited patience. ;) Please review. This was going to be just the one chapter, but chapter two almost wrote itself. Inspired by a wizard in Lego Harry Potter who is throwing a tantrum because he's lost his rubber duck. _


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

For a moment even Minerva was stunned into silence by Albus' announcement. _'Really ! Assembling the entire school over something so trivial !' _Was all she could think. Minerva turned to glare at her husband, opening her mouth to remonstrate with him. The blazing fury she saw in those normally twinkling eyes, made her close her mouth again. Albus was clearly raging - she would have to tread carefully.

As Albus rumbled on, demanding that the culprit confess to his crime, and that his rubber duck be returned instantly, Minerva's gaze swung across the rest of the staff, who were all motionless with terror. Clearly they would be no help at all. Mentally she condemned them as wimps.

As her eyes swivelled to her furious husband once more, Minerva found herself unusally nervous. Her throat tightened, and she gulped slightly, as unwelcome memories of the rare occasions she had faced an angry Dumbledore as a student sprang into her mind. For the briefest of moments she contemplated doing nothing - Albus' anger would surely burn itself out eventually.

Then to her horror and shame, Albus bellowed loudly, "How am I expected to enjoy my sunday bubble bath without my favourite ducky, Quackers !" The headmaster's fist descended on the table with a thunderous crash, "How dare you miscreants think this behaviour acceptable ! I want my Quackers back at once !"

Minerva's fists clenched into balls under the table, as her lips grew taut with contained fury. This really could not be allowed to continue. It was unacceptable - the Headmaster of Hogwarts behaving like a spoilt brat, over a rubber duck of all things. Something would have to be done.

As Minerva paused for thought, she studied Albus intently, noting his scarlet cheeks, the eyes that glinted so brightly, the tightly clenched fists - all uncannily reminiscent of her two year old nephew's tantrums when he'd lost a favourite toy. Minerva drummed her fingers absently on the table, what did her sister do when young Gregory had a tantrum ? As Albus continued to rage, Minerva's nostrills flared, tempting as the thought was she could hardly put him in the naughty corner. There was always bribery though.

Absently Minerva smoothed her robes, with a hand that trembled slightly. Reaching out she laid a calming hand on Albus' arm, forced her voice to remain soft despite her own anger, and said, "Never mind Albus, I'll buy you a brand new rubber duck, and all the candy you can eat."

"Don't want a new rubber duck ! Want my favourite ducky !" Albus pouted, before folding his arms sulkily across his chest.

A comment which caused Minerva to eye her husband much as a dragon might eye it's prey before rending it limb from limb.

Severus' lips twisted into a smirk as he noticed how Minerva was practically steaming at the ears with rage. Dumbledore was going to pay for this later. Serve the old fool right for making him drop one hundred year old extremely valuable bat's blood all over the floor.

Teeth clenched together, lips pale and taut with fury, Minerva somehow managed to control herself enough to pat Albus' arm soothingly. "Well maybe you lost your duck somewhere, why don't we go search for it and let everyone get back to their Sundays ?" She said persuasively.

"Someone stole it !" Albus said stubbornly, sweeping the assembled students with a fiercesome gaze, his eyes lingering on the Weasley twins suspiciously, who paled under their Headmaster's perusal. "I always keep my ducky Quackers in his special place, right on my bath tub where I can find him, next to my bubble bath. That's where he lives. When I got in my bath today poor Quackers was gone ... KIDNAPPED !" Albus ended dramatically, his voice trembling with indignation.

"Don't you mean ducknapped ?" Severus drawled without thinking, then clapped his hand over his mouth in horror. It was too late however, for Albus' attention was now fully on him.

Albus almost seemed to tower over the potions master, as he enquired in a thunderous tone, "Do you find this amusing ?"

With Albus distracted, Minerva took advantage of the oppourtunity to bring an end to this nonsence. Turning to Poppy and Pomona she hissed, "Quick ! Get the children out of here ! Get the others to help you !"

When both women continued to look like startled rabbits caught in the glare of car headlights, Minerva fixed them with her sternest most commanding glare and snarled, "Do you really want me angry at you for the rest of the term ?"

The two friends instantly turned deathly pale, as they shot panic stricken glances at each other - both were well aware of just how fiercesome Minerva's temper could be. Their gaze flitted anxiously between Albus, who was in the middle of a stern lecture about why kidnapped rubber ducks were not a subject for humour, and Minerva who looked as though she couldn't decide who she would like to murder first. At last, after several uncomfortable moments, Poppy whispered nervously, "Sorry Minerva, but right now Albus is scarier than you."

The scathing glare that swept over both women was so venomous that they both had nightmares for the next week about Minerva hexing them as they slept.

Albus had now finished with Severus, who had been reduced to a mere shadow of his normal self, and seemed almost about to shrink beneath the great oak table. "THEFT OF MY FAVOURITE RUBBER DUCKY, A DUCK I HAVE HAD SINCE CHILDHOOD, IS NOT AMUSING !" Albus thundered, his voice echoing around the walls and high ceiling. "I EXPECT MY QUACKERS TO BE RETURNED AT ONCE ! NO ONE LEAVES UNTILL MY DUCKY IS RETURNED !"

"Albus really ! Don't be unreasonable ! You cannot keep everyone here over something so trivial !" Minerva snapped, her supply of patience at an end, as her temper rose to epic levels. The glare Minerva shot at her husband clearly said, if you don't stop this nonsence right now I will hex you where you stand.

"QUACKERS IS NOT TRIVIAL !" Albus bellowed, as he returned Minerva's glare full force.

"It's a duck, an ugly filthy disgusting old duck, that should have been thrown away a long while ago if I had had my way !" Minerva snarled, her fists clenching as though she would like to wring her husband's neck.

"It was you wasn't it ? You stole my ducky ! You never did like poor Quackers did you ?" Albus growled accusingly, intense blue eyes boring into Minerva. "You're jealous of him ... I always knew you were ..."

"I MOST CERTAINLY DID NOT TAKE YOUR BLASTED DUCK ! MY HANDS WOULD NEVER FORGIVE ME IF I TOUCHED THAT GERM RIDDEN OBJECT !" Minerva's bellow easily rivaled her hsuband's for loudness, as her blazing emerald eyes seemed about to explode with fury, a tell tale vein twitching violently in her neck. "ENOUGH OF YOUR CHILDISH NONSENCE DUMBLEDORE !" Minerva commanded, as she swept the assembled students with a gaze that dare not be disobeyed, "You are all dismissed. Go about your business at once."

For a moment a stunned silence hung over the great hall, as though everyone was afraid to breath let alone move. It was followed by the scraping of chairs as the students got uncertainly to their feet.

The bellow of "STAY WHERE YOU ARE !" That erupted from a furious Albus was powerful enough to shake the great hall to it's foundations, "NO ONE LEAVES UNTILL I DISMISS THEM !"

"OH YES THEY DO ! THIS FARCE HAS GONE ON LONG ENOUGH !" Minerva's hand slammed against the table, her cheeks flaming scarlet with fury.

"OH NO THEY DON'T !" roared Albus, his eyes blazing ferociously.

"OH YES THEY DO !" Minerva's nose was just an inch from her husband's, her bellow nearly loud enough to rupture his ear drums.

As fast as Albus bellowed "stay", Minerva would bellow "dismissed", untill the students were going up and down like row upon row of jack in the boxes. Severus watched and listened with barely disguised glee, he would have enough material to tease Minerva for months, probably years. As for Dumbledore, the best he could hope for was that Minerva wouldn't hurt him too much before she killed him. The rest of the staff were aghast with silent horror, every rational thought driven from their minds by the sight of Albus and Minerva bellowing at each other in front of all the students.

As Albus thundered, "STAY !" once more, Minerva whipped out her wand, and pointed it direct at him. There was just enough time for a flicker of fear to cross Albus' face, before he was transformed into a bright yellow, extremely small duck, with soft fluffy feathers and light blue eyes.

Scarcely bothering to spare him a glance, Minerva swept the gaping students with her fiercest most commanding gaze, "You are all to leave at once unless you wish to spend the remainder of your time at Hogwarts in detention !" She snapped, in a tone that made the students almost trip over each other in their rush to leave.

The noise of scraping chairs and rapidly moving feet nearly drowned the outraged quacking that was coming from a tiny yellow duck, who was flapping his wings up and down furiously. As the great hall grew empty, the quacking grew louder and louder, and even more furious. When the last student had left, Minerva snarled, "And now to deal with you !"

The duck's bright blue indignant eyes widened in horror as Minerva's hand reached down, and closed around it's neck.

_Author's Notes_

_Firstly please review, and let me know what you think. I'm sorry this chapter has taken longer than it was meant to, most of it was written and ready to publish a couple of weeks or more ago, but then life decided to give me lots of distractions, and so I've only just managed to complete it, and try to improve the bits I felt needed improving. _

_Hopefully the next update will be far faster. I hope you all enjoyed my attempt at a cliff hanger. :D If this made you laugh, then please review. _

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	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Albus kicked his tiny webbed feet frantically, and flapped his fluffy yellow wings furiously as Minerva hoisted him high into the air, untill he was level with her face. Enraged emerald eyes bored into him, as Minerva snarled through gritted teeth, "That will teach you to behave like a spoilt brat Albus Dumbledore ! The Headmaster of Hogwarts making a fool of himself in front of the entire school, never in all my years have I heard of such behaviour !" Minerva gave the struggling ball of fluff in her hand an outraged shake, "How dare you ! You will stay like that untill you are ready to behave yourself !"

It seemed Albus was in no mood to behave, for tiny and fluffy as he was, he quacked his indignation and fury as loudly as he could. Bright ice blue eyes shooting sparks of rage at his wife, as his webbed feet kicked even more madly, and his wings flapped violently. Such was the vehemence of the quacking that it sounded almost as though the tiny duck was valiant enough, or foolish enough, to swear at Minerva.

"Don't you dare quack to me like that !" Minerva snapped, and almost trembling with fury, she grabbed a large metal pot off the table, and unceremoniously dropped the still kicking duck into it. "That will keep you quiet !" she snarled, as she slammed the lid shut, muffling the sound of outraged quacking very effectively.

Clutching the pot in a clenched fist which was white with fury, Minerva strode out of the great hall. The pot swung back and forth in her hand, as she swept along the stone passages, and a series of loud clangs, interspersed with indignant quacks and hisses came from within. Severus, who was leaning casually against the stone wall, turned to Rolanda as Minerva swept by, and drawled, "I imagine it'll be roast duck for supper tonight !"

At last after a very rough ride for the tiny duck, Minerva reached their private chambers. Within seconds she had crossed them, and was flinging the door of the ornate marbled bathroom open. Striding across to a table near the window, she turned the pot unceremoniously upside down. With a loud metallic clang the lid fell off, and out tumbled a small, indignant, bright yellow duck. Like a ball of escaped knitting wool, the duck rolled squawking across the table, finally coming to rest against the wall, in a heap of furious yellow feathers and kicking feet.

Minerva stood hands on hips glaring down at Albus, her emerald eyes flashing triumphantly, as he struggled to regain his balence after the dizzying ride through the corridors of the castle. "I do not believe your blasted duck was stolen ! I think you lost it, as you lose everything !" Minerva stated firmly, "Therefore ..."

A particularly loud volley of quacks and hisses interrupted Minerva, as Albus flapped furiously up and down in front of her, webbed feet kicking as he lept into the air and landed, again and again, vivid orange bill opening and closing angrily, soft yellow feathers almost standing on end with rage. Suddenly Minerva's fist slammed against the table so hard that flecks of plaster fell from the ceiling, and the table rocked violently on it's legs. "SHUT UP ! she bellowed, "Or I'll give you to Filch's cat to play with !"

Instantly there was silence, as Albus froze in mid leap, seeming to hang suspended in mid air for a moment, before landing with a gentle thud. His blue eyes wide with horror, as he recalled how he had discovered Filch's cat tormenting a tiny bird just a few days earlier. The glance he shot at his wife, from under feathered brows, seemed almost to say, you wouldn't really do that, would you ?

The answering glare he received from his furious wife, seemed to convince albus that at this moment she actually might give him to Mrs Norris, and instantly he tried to make himself look as small, and insignificant as possible, as he cringed back against the marbled wall of the bathroom.

"That's better ! Minerva said firmly, "Are you going to behave yourself now ?"

A small mournful quack came from the huddled mass of yellow feathers that was Albus.

Minerva fixed him with her most threatening gaze, the one she normally saved for the Weasley twins, and demanded, "Do you promise to behave if I turn you back ? No more nonsence Albus !"

A single soft quack answered her, as blue eyes tried to evoke sympathy by directing their most piteous gaze at her.

"Very well then," Minerva said, her wand flicked swiftly, and there was a flash of green smoke. Albus sat atop the table, restored to human form, picking yellow feathers out of his long silver beard, and eying Minerva warily.

Minerva fixed her husband with a no nonsence glare, and stated in a tone which dared him to argue. "I do not believe your duck was stolen ! As I said, I believe you lost it !"

"I did not !" Albus interrupted indignantly, "It was ..."

"Did I give you permission to speak ?" Minerva demanded thunderously, as she flexed her wand threateningly. This was enough to silence Albus very effectively, though his normally twinkling eyes looked distinctly sulky and ill treated, as he folded his arms across his chest. "I am going to look for your wretched toy, and you can either sit there and sulk like a spoilt brat or help me ! The only reason I so much as bother with this, is because I refuse to have you upsetting the entire school with your ridiculous accusations, do you understand me ?" Minerva snarled.

Instead of answering Albus sat silently, staring down at the wooden table sullenly, his lower lip quivering beneath his long white beard. Minerva's fists clenched and unclenched as though tempted to wring his neck, then she turned furiously away from him, her eyes sweeping the bathroom with a burning gaze. Suddenly something seemed to catch her eye, and like a dragon descending on it's prey she swooped downwards to lift a dusty, cobweb covered rubber duck from it's hiding place underneath the giant cast iron bath tub, where it had lain half obscured by the bright purple bath mat.

"What is this Albus ?" she demanded, as she waved the rubber duck under his nose irately.

"My ducky !" Albus squealed in delight, his earlier sulkiness forgotten, as he lept off the table and reached out joyously for it.

Immediately Minerva whipped it behind her back, where Albus couldn't reach it, and fixed him with a baleful glare. "The duck you said had been stolen !"

"Oh !" said Albus in a small voice.

"The duck you yelled at the entire school over !"

"Ooops !" Said Albus in an even smaller voice.

"This duck does not look stolen to me ! Does it look stolen to you Albus ?" Minerva demanded thunderously.

"Perhaps the thief got scared, and tried to return it, and dropped it there." Albus said hopefully.

"ALBUS !" Minerva bellowed.

"Oh all right." Albus muttered, as he shuffled his feet awkwardly, and gazed at the floor in a slightly shame faced manner.

"Is that all you've got to say ?" Minerva demanded furiously.

"I'm sorry." Albus whispered, as he shot a pleading glance at Minerva from under bushy eyebrows. "Can I have my ducky back now ?" he added hopefully.

"Don't you think you owe the rest of the school an apology ?" Minerva demanded, "You practically accused all of them of theft you know !"

There was an uneasy silence from Albus, who was looking ever more guilty and shamefaced, and kept shooting beseeching glances at Minerva, from eyes that were now soft and innocent, instead of full of fury. "I'll make it up to them ..." he muttered at last.

"You will apologise to all of them at breakfast tomorrow !" Minerva stated firmly. "No rubber duck untill you do !"

There was a horrified gasp from Albus, as he glanced piteously at his duck, which dangled from Minerva's hand tantalisingly out of reach. Thinking frantically, he protested, "But Minerva my darling, I'm not sure that Headmasters are meant to apologise ..."

"They aren't meant to behave like spoilt brats either !" Minerva snarled. "I mean it Albus, you are not getting your duck back untill you apologise, and furthermore you're sleeping on the couch tonight !" There was a brief pause, and Minerva added in her most determined tone, "And every night untill you do what you're told !"

Leaving Albus stunned into silence, she turned and strode from the room.

That night Albus endured a miserable lonely night on the couch, he missed Minerva desperately, as he tossed and turned, unable to sleep well without his wife's warm body next to him. Several times he was tempted to risk entering their bedroom, and climb into the giant fourposter bed they normally shared, but the memory of Minerva's rage that afternoon prevented him from seeking her out.

Even though Minerva was far more comfortable than Albus, she too endured a difficult night, and longed on several occasions to call him to her, to hold him in her arms, and kiss him. Then she would remember how dreadfully he had behaved, how he had raged at the entire school, and her lips would tighten in disapproval and anger once more. She couldn't recall ever having been so angry at Albus before.

The next morning the school gathered for breakfast in the great hall, as normal. The large room hummed with the murmur of many voices, all of which seemed to be discussing yesterday's excitement, and the ensuring fight between Headmaster and Deputy Headmistress. The ghosts were proclaiming that in all their hundreds of years at Hogwarts, never had they known anything like it. The staff were torn between disapproval and amusement, whilst the students contented themselves with wondering if Dumbledore had finally gone completely crazy. As the Headmaster and his Deputy entered, the entire school fell silent, with several of the younger pupils almost afraid to breath in case Dumbledore began to bellow at them again.

A flush of shame spread across Albus' cheeks as he noted this, he had never wanted any of his pupils to be that scared of him, and he took his seat in an unusually subdued mood, spending the next few minutes toying with his food, and eating very little. He had spent most of last night regretting his uncharacteristic temper loss, and now he regretted it even more, bad enough to have Minerva still angry with him, but now to see his students look so nervous as well.

Albus was so lost in thought that he jumped slightly as Minerva rose to her feet, and tapped her glass lightly with her silver porridge spoon. "Attention please ! The Headmaster has something he wishes to say to you all !" rang out across the hall in Minerva's clear Scottish accent.

A sea of expectant faces gazed up at the staff table, as Albus got nervously to his feet, shooting an anxious glance at Minerva, who sat stoneyfaced at his side. "Ahem ... yes of course ..." Albus said, then ground painfully to a halt, quite nonplussed by the way so many of the students seemed almost afraid of him, he simply wasn't used to them looking at him like that.

As the silence continued, Rolanda turned to Severus who sat next to her, and whispered, "I almost feel sorry for him, don't you ?"

"I don't !" snarled Severus, who was still seething over the loss of his extremely valuable bat's blood.

As Albus still hesitated, Minerva glared sternly at him, and a low rumble which was only audible to the staff table, emerged from her throat.

"Did Minerva just growl at Albus ?" Rolanda wondered.

"Personally I'm surprised she hasn't killed him !"" Drawled Severus.

Hearing the sound Minerva made, and feeling her eyes burning into him, Albus tried desperately to gather his thoughts and continue. Frantically he tried to think of all those things which normally calmed him down, of sherbert lemons, and hot chocolate, of candy and ice cream, but nothing worked. Then he remembered how cold and lonely he had felt last night without Minerva, and how soft and warm she was when she slept snuggled in his arms. Spreading his arms wide, and forcing his face into it's brightest most benign beam, Albus gazed directly into the face of his students, and said brightly. "Well my dears it seems that your Headmaster was even more of an old fool than normal yesterday, and for that I heartily apologise, but even the best of us loose our tempers on occasion. I'm sure you'll all be delighted to know that my ducky has been safely found." As he paused Albus felt the hall grow tense, as though they expected him to announce the identity of the duck thief, sighing silently he continued. "It appears that my duck was not stolen, but had decided to hide under my bath tub, I've had a stern word with him and he's promised not to play such jokes again." Albus shot a sidelong glance at Minerva, who was staring at him with a mix of despair and anger. "In light of this joyous news, I'm sure you all want to celebrate Quackers return, and so I declare today a school holiday ! This afternoon there will be a huge party ! Once you've all had breakfast I suggest you get ready !"

As Albus finished speaking the entire school lept to their feet and applauded loudly, all except Minerva who was shaking her head despairingly, and muttering about upcoming exams, and why on earth did he have to keep on talking about his blasted duck ! Undercover of the noise Albus slipped his hand tentatively into Minerva's, his long fingers stroking the inside of her wrist in a manner which he knew she found irrisistable. "Am I forgiven my love ?" he whispered, "I missed you last night, and I'd very much like to spend the rest of today making up for lost time, and trying to show you how sorry I am."

The twinkle in Albus' bright blue eyes was unmistakable, and Minerva knew just how he wished to spend the rest of the day. One of his hands had slipped to rest upon her leg, it's warmth thrilled her, just as his touch always did, and the plea for forgiveness in his eyes was irrisistable. "I believe I've had enough breakfast." Minerva murmured softly, as she smiled into his eyes, "Coming Albus ?"

Leaving the rest of the staff to try to restore some semblance of order among the cheering students, Albus got lightly to his feet and followed his wife happily. Once they were alone her hand slipped into his, and together they walked hand in hand to their chambers.

_Author's Notes_

_Sorry this update has taken so long, I just lost interest and enthusiasm for this story, and needed to write things other than humour for a while. I do hope you all enjoy the final chapter of this, and please do review and let me know what you think. I hope the ending was nearly as fluffy as Albus' feathers. ;)_


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